Hi, I'm 13, and I've got a lot of friends at my school.  Most of them are christian. However, there is one that is a mormon and one that is an athiest. Is it wrong to be friends with them?

Sincerely, Choosing Carefully

Dear Choosing Carefully,

There is a difference between a friend and a close intimate friend. Not all friendships are equal. David and Jonathan’s friendship was so close they were like brothers (1 Sam 18:1). Jesus was close to all his apostles- but especially to Peter, James, and John (Mk 5:37). Jesus also was kind and friendly to the tax collectors and sinners (Mk 2:15-16), but there wasn’t a great amount of depth to His relationship with them unless they converted. Best friends, friends, and casual friends are all friends, but not all are equal.

As you choose your friends you will need to make an assessment of how deep the friendship should be. Do they have the same values as you? Are they good people? Do they help you to be a better person? Are you their friend because they need you or vice versa? There isn’t anything wrong with being friends with people who aren’t exactly like you, but it is important to make sure that they aren’t leading you away from God. Any friend that influences you to compromise your morals or mocks you for being such a ‘goodie-goodie’ is not really a friend at all. However, if your mormon and atheist friends are willing to accept you as you are, then let your light shine. Maybe you will win them to Christ! Letting unbelievers see your life is one of the most important parts of being a christian (Matt 5:16).

Don’t shy away from people just because they aren’t christians, but be careful that your deepest, closest friendships are with people who have the same values as you. Always be aware of the danger of being corrupted by the world when you are choosing your closest friends (1 Cor 15:33).

I have a question about a man having more than one wife.  I know that in our culture it is something that is looked upon with disdain, but in other cultures it is an accepted practice.  I don’t want to add anything or take anything away from the Word of God, but how much of this issue is cultural, and how much is biblical? I know that in the Old Testament, God speaks to Adam and Eve and says the two shall become one flesh, but all throughout the Old Testament there are cases of a man having more than one wife. For example, David had many wives, and he was a man after God’s own heart.  If monogamous marriage was a commandment, all those people in the Old Testament sinned by having more than one wife.  I just don’t see God giving a commandment and then just letting man break it. In the New Testament, the qualification for elders is used to show that a man can’t have more than one wife; however, that is specifically for a man who is in that position, and there are qualifications listed that don’t apply to a non-elder Christian (like having believing children).  Also, I am sure there were first century conversions of men who have more than one wife, and if it is a commandment, then they would have had to divorce all but their first wife. I know that because it is viewed as wrong by our culture that, even if we can do it, we shouldn’t have more than one wife.  I also know that a guy would have to be crazy to want to deal with more than one wife and the conflict between the wives.  All I am concerned with is if it is a biblical commandment or a cultural restraint.

Sincerely, Vowing To Learn

Dear Vowing To Learn,

Polygamy is never expressly condemned in the Bible.  It is also never treated as the standard... but as the exception. There are scores of examples of monogamy being God’s preference for man:

1. Adam & Eve were designed monogamously (Gen. 2:24)
2. No polygamy existed until 7 generations after Adam (Gen 4:19)
3. Noah, the last righteous man of his day, had only one wife (Gen 7:13)
4. Qualification for an elder (Tit 1:6)
5. Qualification for a deacon (1 Tim 3:12)
6. Qualification for a worthy widow (1 Tim 5:9)
7. Every New Testament command for a husband or wife assumes monogamy in the commandments. (Mk 10:12, 1 Cor 7:3, Eph 5:33, etc.)
8. The comparison of Christ and the church to a husband and wife relies on a monogamous design for marriage (Eph 5:22-23)
9. God clearly states it as His design for marriage in the New Testament (1 Cor 7:2)

On the same hand, there are multiple examples of the pitfalls of polygamy:

1. Sarah and Hagar fought (Gen 16:4)
2. Rachel and Leah fought over Jacob (Gen 29:30-31)
3. Hannah and Penninah’s rivalry (1 Sam 1:2-6)
4. Solomon’s idolatrous wives (1 Kings 11:4)

Our problem is that God never specifically condemns these men for their polygamy. It is that silence on this particular issue that gives us the greatest consternation. However, we must remember that silence on a particular issue is not the same as God’s approval of the behavior. Everyone can agree that the Scriptures overwhelmingly approve of and allow monogamy while the evidence for polygamy is suspect at best.

We now enter into the issue of opinion, and anything we say must be left in that realm. My opinion is that if a man had multiple wives before obeying the gospel, he would not be required to divorce any of them. However, once someone becomes a christian, they are commanded by God to only seek out one spouse for a lifetime (1 Cor 7:2).

My husband was baptized at the age of sixteen by full immersion; however, it was done by the Mormon church where he had made several friends and had begun attending church with them as a youth.  My question is: does he need to be re-baptized?  Thank you!

Sincerely,
Do Over?

Dear Do Over?,

Yes, he does need to be re-baptized because he was baptized for the wrong reasons and by the wrong authority.  People are baptized all the time without being saved.  The word ‘baptism’ comes from the Greek word ‘baptizo’ which means ‘immersion’.  The word ‘baptism’ is the same word that Greeks used when a ship sank to the bottom of the ocean or when someone dove to the bottom of a swimming pool.  In the most technical sense, people are baptized when they take baths, go swimming, etc.  Taking a bath will baptize you, but it definitely won’t save you.

Baptism is only effective when it is done by faith (Col 2:12) and by the authority of Christ (Acts 2:38).  The Mormon church baptizes people based upon the teachings of the Book of Mormon and their prophet, Joseph Smith… not the Bible.  Now, any of our Mormon readers will immediately begin to yell and wail at that last sentence and tell you that it isn’t true.  They will tell you that they baptize people because the Bible says so, but we can guarantee you that if the Book of Mormon said “don’t be baptized” and the Bible said “do be baptized”… they would go with the Book of Mormon’s doctrine.  It is merely convenient for their argument that the Book of Mormon and the New Testament both teach baptism.  Mormons baptize people to put them in the Mormon church, and they do it because Joseph Smith said so.  The Bible teaches that we should be baptized to wash away our sins (Acts 22:16), to put us into the Lord’s church (Acts 2:41), and by Jesus’ authority (Matt 28:18-20).  Your husband definitely needs to be baptized for the right reasons.

What is with Mormons?

Sincerely,
Scratching My Head

Dear Scratching My Head,

Those well-dressed, bike-helmet wearing young men traveling in pairs through your community are known as Mormons, and they are part of the Church of Christ of Latter-Day Saints (LDS).  The LDS church was formed in the early 1800s by a man named Joseph Smith, Jr.  Joseph Smith professed to have been visited by the angel, Moroni.  Supposedly, Moroni directed Mr. Smith to a set of golden plates which he then dug up and translated from their ancient language into English.  This “translation” is known as the Book of Mormon and is one of four books that the LDS church uses for guidance.

Okay, now that we’ve explained who they are, let’s see what the Bible says about Mormonism.  God tells us that even if an angel preaches a different message than the Bible, he is accursed (Gal 1:8).  That means that even if Moroni were real, Joseph Smith shouldn’t have listened to him.  Secondly, the Bible tells us everything we need to know about life and godliness (2 Pet 1:3).  We are also told to never add or subtract from the Word of God (Rev 22:18-19).  Either the Book of Mormon says more than the Bible – in which case, we shouldn’t listen to it, or it says exactly the same thing as the Bible – in which case, we don’t need it!  Ultimately, the LDS church is a false religion that is leading people astray and destroying their souls.

Does the Bible say anything about caffeine?

Sincerely,
Wired

Dear Wired,

Nope.  Much to the joy and relief of those of us in the Pacific Northwest, the Bible never says anything about caffeine, and it certainly never says it is a sin.  The Church of Christ of Latter-Day Saints, also known as the Mormon church, strictly forbids the use of caffeine… but the Bible never does.

The Bible tells us to take care of our bodies (1 Cor 6:19).  God also warns against gluttony (Pr 23:21).  There is much debate over the effects of caffeine upon the body, but no studies are conclusive enough that one could condemn all use of caffeine.  Caffeine, like all other consumables, should be used with moderation and balance… but it isn’t wrong.