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FRIENDS

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Sudden Death

Tuesday, November 07, 2017
I have a friend who unexpectedly passed away a few weeks ago.  He collapsed, went into a seizure, had a heart attack, and finally entered a coma -- all within minutes.  This was all due to a brainstem leak which was inoperable.  He had no brain or body organ activity.  He was taken off life support after four days.

He was not a christian as far as I know.  He was involved in sin (living with his girlfriend who is currently pregnant, drinking, cussing, etc., and his girlfriend is married to another man… although I'm not sure if he knew this as this was a new relationship for him, and it's all come out since his passing) when he passed away.

My question is: do you think he had a chance to make it to heaven?

We on the outside look at collapsing as happening within a second or two; although, people that talk about death experiences, talk about "their life flashing before their eyes."  Do you think, by chance, in the person’s mind as they are dying everything becomes slow motion?  Although, we looking from the outside look at it as a second or two?  That God allows their mind enough time to repent when we don't see that time?  What about being in a coma?  Could that be their moment?  As far as I know, doctors don't really know what's going on inside you while in a coma.

I hope this makes sense.  I am broken because, as a christian, I know what the Bible says about going to heaven, but I also know God doesn't want anyone to perish, and He is a God full of grace and many chances.  I don't believe the Bible says anything about this subject (or does it?), but what are your thoughts?  Thank you so much.

Sincerely,
Clinging To Hope

Dear Clinging To Hope,

There is absolutely no way to tell what happens in someone’s mind in the last moments near death.  What we can tell you is that God doesn’t make mistakes.  We can find comfort that God doesn’t desire anyone to perish, but for all of us to come to repentance (2 Pet 3:9).  Anyone that goes to hell will go there because they chose to be there in spite of God reaching out to them throughout life.  No one accidentally ends up in hell, and no one accidentally ends up in heaven.  Our lives dictate our eternal future.  We can’t tell you the eternal future of your friend – Christ is the judge of the living and the dead (2 Tim 4:1).  We can tell you that we are so very sorry for your loss and that a sudden death is extremely painful.  Our prayers are with you in this time of grief.  We can also tell you that the only way to know for sure that we are going to heaven is to do what God says it takes to get there.  Read our article “What Must I Do To Be Saved?” for yourself, and then decide for yourself where you feel your friend stands in relation to the Bible’s teachings.  Ultimately, God doesn’t make mistakes – if your friend is meant to be in heaven, he will be.

Hoo-Don't

Monday, September 04, 2017
Hi.  My grandmother does hoodoo; I know the name after researching the things she owns.  Is she going to hell; is hoodoo a sin?  The biggest thing is that she is a christian, a very godly woman; she attends church every Sunday and even gives one hundred dollars every month.

Sincerely,
Grandma Grief

Dear Grandma Grief,

Hoodoo is wrong and is a warping of the Scriptures.  Hoodoo is a term used for those who use the Bible like a magic spell book and protective talisman.  Instead of treating the Bible like an instruction book for life (which is the right attitude – 2 Pet 1:3, Rom 1:16, Rom 10:17), Hoodoo treats the Bible like a lucky rabbit’s foot.  If you open to the right Psalm or the read the proper verse at the proper time, you will be given special protection, health, or powers.  This is totally opposite of what the Bible teaches.  In fact, during the days of Paul, there were exorcists that tried this tactic.  A group of Jewish exorcists saw that Paul had power from God, so they tried to talk and act like Paul in order to receive the same powers Paul had… it didn’t work (Acts 19:13-16).  The Bible isn’t a tool to gain magical powers; it is a pattern for living (2 Tim 1:13).  No matter how much money your grandmother gives and how regularly she attends services, this practice is sinful.

Speaking Up

Friday, May 26, 2017
I did something to a friend years ago.  How do I get up the courage to apologize?

Sincerely,
Secretly Sorry

Dear Secretly Sorry,

Courage comes from knowing that you are doing the right thing.  When we build our lives and choices on a good foundation, we can find peace through the storms of life (Matt 7:24-27).  The truth sets us free (Jhn 8:32).  Asking for forgiveness is the right thing to do (Jas 5:16); you know it is the right thing to do (Jas 4:17), and in the end, you will be happy that you did.

+Add To Friends

Friday, March 31, 2017
Why is it that I’m a very good people-person, and I had friends, but I’m only twenty-seven and a mom and a wife, and I have no friends.  I see so many other married moms with close friends; why is life not letting me have friends?  All the friends I had have betrayed me in some sinful ways, so I stay away, and some just came in my life, and when they find new friends, I’m just a memory to them.  This problem is hurting my heart and soul so bad; I feel like I’m worthless (not as a mom and wife, but as a person to friends); have I missed something?  Or am I not getting something?  Please help.

Sincerely,
A Broken Wing

Dear A Broken Wing,

We can’t tell you exactly why you have no friends, but we can promise that you will be blessed because you removed yourself from sinful relationships.  God tells us that bad company corrupts good morals (1 Cor 15:33).  You made it clear that you’ve separated yourself from those who are bad company, and anytime that we heed God’s warnings, greater blessings are eventually on their way.

Being a wife and a mother is one of the most honorable and godly things that you can do with your life (read the story of the worthy woman in Proverbs 31).  The more you strive to be a friend to others and an example of love in your family, the more joy you will find.  The greatest blessing of friendship is in the giving (Acts 20:35, Pr 17:17).  Speak kindly, show purity of heart, and God promises that friendships will eventually bloom (Pr 22:11).  Life rarely takes the turns we expect, but, in the end, God causes all things to work together for good (Rom 8:28).

With Friends Like These

Thursday, December 15, 2016
I am a believer.  Unfortunately, I hang out with lost people and have a tendency to do what they do (drink, etc.).  I feel God drawing me closer to Him.  I have a very wounded heart from the past.  Here is my question: will God in one form or another take people He does not want me to be around out of my life since I can’t seem to do it on my own?

In the last month, I have had a falling out with three of these people, and it wasn’t my doing.  Please explain; thanks.

Sincerely,
Too Friendly

Dear Too Friendly,

The Lord helps those who make decisions to put Him first.  God won’t magically remove all the temptations from your life, but He will make sure you are never tempted beyond what you are able (1 Cor 10:13).  God promises that the struggles of this life can be resisted… and there is an expectation that you will do that.  Bad company corrupts good morals (1 Cor 15:33).  As you expressed, unhealthy relationships will destroy your soul like rust destroys iron.

God promises that if we draw near to Him, He will draw near to us (Jas 4:8).  As you make decisions to purify your life and build healthy relationships, God will reward you for those decisions.

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