My daughter would like to start attending a congregation much closer to her home, but the congregation sends a small fund to another church to support a preacher in Cuba. It also has, on occasion, had ladies’ meetings at which a lunch is served. The church that she attends at present does much of the same things, except they have church sponsored pot-lucks held at the building once a month and game days on a chosen day at the building. Both of the congregations are in the liberal camp, but the first congregation has a good program for learning, strong elders, and would not pressure a person into doing anything against their own conscience. The question is, which of these two congregations would you recommend that she attend, and how would you counsel her to give of her means since she knows it is her responsibility? Thank you; she will be looking forward to hearing the answer.

Sincerely, Motherly Mother

Dear Motherly Mother,

It sounds like a no-brainer to me. You are trying to choose between two undesirable situations, so I will only respond to the question you asked. The first congregation you mentioned is:

1. much closer
2. less liberal
3. has better elders
4. has better teaching

In my opinion, that would be the best choice.

Now, concerning your question on giving: you certainly need to give as you have been prospered (1 Cor 16:2). I know nothing about the congregation you described, but I do know that there are a hundred different degrees of liberalism as well as conservatism. If you can give with a good conscience (1 Tim 1:19), then give at that congregation. If you believe your money will be used unscripturally and/or will be used to promote more unscriptural projects, then I would send my money to a congregation that would use it in harmony with the Lord's will. Perhaps that congregation would also be a better one to attend.

I am on a quest for truth... as are so many others. Upon seeking the truth, a question hit me and has continued to taunt me in my mind.

How is it that man differentiates his will apart from God’s? There is my will, and there is God's will.

I hear VERY MANY people say, "God's will for my life is to do this and that... "  Then I think, well, “If God were not part of your life, I think you would choose that same career path and life plan anyway.”

John 6:38 makes me wonder, did Jesus Himself have a will of His own apart from God’s?

Sincerely, Seeking His Will

Dear Seeking His Will,

The only way you can know God’s will is if He tells you. Many people claim to have visions from God or to ‘know in their heart that God’s will is ________’, but that is not how God communicates with us. God communicates with us through His Word (1 Cor 2:9-11). It is through hearing God’s Word that we gain an understanding of how our lives should be lived (Rom 10:17). The apostles wrote down the mystery of God’s will, so that we also can know what they knew (Eph 3:1-4). God wrote down once and for all His will for mankind in the Bible (Jude 3). The Bible contains everything that pertains to how our lives should be lived (2 Pet 1:3). The only way to know God’s will is through God’s Word – everything else is man’s opinion.

Even Jesus recognized the need to submit to God’s Word above His own. In the garden, Jesus made it clear that He did not want to die on the cross, but that He would subject His will to the Father’s (Lk 22:42). When the devil tempted Him, Jesus stated that a godly life is built upon God’s Word (Matt 4:4). Jesus Christ let God’s Word decide His future… not His own personal feelings. We must seek to imitate Christ (1 Cor 11:1). In all that we do, we must seek Bible authority. Let us go back to the Bible for our answers to all of life’s questions.

I would like your thoughts on taking a deeper look at the Holy Spirit. Sometimes I wonder to myself if enough emphasis is placed on Him.  God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit - all three are one, yet at the same time They are divine individuals.

1 Cor 2:9-10 says: "Things which eye has not seen and ear not heard, and which have not entered the heart of man, all that God has prepared for those who love Him. For to us God revealed them through the Spirit; for the Spirit searches all things, even the depths of God."

Before Jesus left this earth, He said the Comforter would come, which I believe is the Word of God. By reading the Bible, the Holy Spirit guides us into all truth.  What I am wondering is in our worship to God, it is easy to remember the Father and the Son, but do we at times take the Holy Spirit for granted, or is my perspective out of focus?

Sincerely, Emphatically Emphasizing

Dear Emphatically Emphasizing,

There is no doubt that we take the Holy Spirit for granted. We also take the Father and the Son for granted! Each of these individuals are distinct, and the easiest way to see this is at Jesus’ baptism. Jesus comes out of the water, the Father speaks from heaven, and the Holy Spirit descends as a dove (Matt 3:16-17). They are one in purpose but unique in roles.

Jesus came to pay the price for sins (Matt 26:28), the Father planned and has oversight of everything (Eph 1:3-4), and the Holy Spirit revealed the plan to mankind through the Bible (Jhn 14:26, Jhn 15:26).

The problem is that we pray to the Father (Lk 11:2); we remember Christ in the Lord’s Supper (1 Cor 11:24)… but what about the Holy Spirit? The Holy Spirit functions in a much subtler way then either the Father or Son. Look here to see our response to a question about how the Holy Spirit works.

The following is my opinion, and so please accept it as such. The Holy Spirit is emphasized less because He wishes to be emphasized less. We assume that all of the Godhead desires to be equally worshipped and praised, but that isn’t necessarily true. The Bible (written by the Holy Spirit) seems to emphasize obedience to the Father, gratitude to the Son, and trust in the providence of the Holy Spirit. Of course, They are all worthy of obedience, gratitude, and trust. However, the emphasis seems to be placed differently upon each of the Godhead. The Holy Spirit functions more behind the scenes than either the Father or the Son, therefore I believe He wants them to receive the majority of the attention. Of course, we will know for sure when we get to heaven.

Titus 1:6 speaks of "the husband of one wife".

Can a divorced brother who is remarried be referred to as “the husband of one wife” and thus be ordained as a deacon?  His wife is also a divorcee.

Please help; I am confused!

Sincerely, Choosing Wisely

Dear Choosing Wisely,

He may be qualified; he may not – your congregation will need to properly judge whether he fulfills the requirements of Tit 1:6. The phrase ‘husband of one wife’ literally means a ‘one woman man’ in the Greek. He must be devoted exclusively and faithfully to his one wife. A man who is widowed and then remarried could still be properly described as a ‘one woman man’ because he was completely devoted to his first wife until her death, and now is fully devoted to his current wife.

The question you will have to wrestle with is if this divorced brother has shown the character trait of monogamous fidelity. Why did he get divorced? Was it for infidelity? Was he always faithful to her? Did she leave him, or did he leave her? How does he behave with his current wife? How long has he been married to his current wife? The answers to these questions will help you to assess whether he is a faithful ‘one woman man’.

You are right to be concerned about him serving as a deacon. Divorce is a red flag that should make us pause before appointing a man as a qualified deacon, but depending on the circumstances surrounding his divorce, he may still be qualified.

I've been a member of my church for my entire life, and I was raised based in this doctrine.  I see some major inconsistencies with the doctrine and the Bible.  I have looked into other congregations that might better fit the Bible's description of what we are supposed to be doing, but I can't find anything that's completely proper according to the Bible.

I can't justify moving to another church (that is also imperfect) even though I understand that some things aren't being done according to Scripture.  What should I do?

Sincerely, Church Shopping

Dear Church Shopping,

Don’t look for another church with another doctrine; look for a church that is trying to follow the New Testament pattern as closely as possible. A congregation doesn’t need to be full of perfect people, but they need to be trying to faithfully follow God’s Word and not their own ideologies. The following are a few markers of what you should find in every church that is faithful to Christ’s Word:

1. Their name should be Biblical. Church of Christ (Rom 16:16), the church (Acts 14:27), church of God (1 Cor 1:2), the Way (Acts 24:14) – all of these are Biblical names given to a local congregation. Having the right name on the front of the building doesn’t mean they are the right church, but if they can’t even get their name from the Bible, they probably aren’t worth wasting your time on.
2. Their doctrine should be a copy of the New Testament (Acts 2:42). Any creeds, ‘statements of faith’, articles of belief, manuals, or handbooks are from man and not from God. You want a congregation that uses the Bible to decide their practices.
3. They are autonomous. Every congregation of the New Testament had independence. Only local elders were over them (1 Pet 5:1-2, Acts 14:23). They were bound to follow Christ as their only head (Eph 5:23). No boards or committees, no headquarters in some other state, no popes or potentates – what you are looking for is a local body of believers which is accountable to Christ and His Word.
4. The church’s work should be simple. The church of the first century wasn’t involved in every community and political arena. Their work was focused on three things – caring for needy christians (Acts 4:34), preaching to the lost, and teaching the saved (Acts 15:35). Find a congregation who is committed to being about Christ’s work.
5. They should be open to examination. Any congregation that is serving Christ should be willing to explain why they do what they do. They should be willing to be examined because they are constantly examining themselves (2 Cor 13:5). There is nothing wrong with asking a congregation where their practices can be found in the New Testament. Ask questions and expect Bible answers for them.

These five things are by no means all of the characteristics of Christ’s church, but this should help narrow down your options significantly. Most people accept mediocrity from their church; don’t do that. It is unfair to expect the people of a congregation to be perfect… you will never find perfect humans. However, you should demand intellectual honesty and Biblical faithfulness from any congregation you want to be a member of. If you would like additional help as you look for a faithful congregation in your area, please email us at askyourpreacher@mvchurchofchrist.org and we would be happy to help you look.